Childhood Mental Health : Toddler and Preschooler Red Flags by Kevin B Doyle

Childhood Mental Health: Toddler and Preschooler Red Flags by Kevin B. Doyle How people, even little kids, think, feel and act as they encounter life's ups and downs affects our mental health. When all is functioning as it should, good mental health allows children to think clearly, develop socially and learn new skills. According to the CDC, in 2005–2006, 15 percent of U.S. children ages 4 to 17 years had parents who talked to a healthcare provider or school staff member about their child's emotional or behavioral difficulties. About five percent of those children received medication and another five percent also received treatment other than medication for challenges. Toddler and Preschooler Mental Health Can you imagine the panic that would ensue if we saw adults behaving like ordinary kids? Getting angry easily, failing to pay attention to what's going on, pestering other people, repeating what's said to them, taking off their clothes in public or asking embarrassing questions in loud voices? These activities are all things that might cause concern regarding an adult's mental health, but they are regular, commonplace, developmentally-appropriate events in the lives of toddlers and preschoolers. However, there are other, less desirable behaviors your child could display that signal a potential mental health problem. Most kids act "sad" if they don't get their way, have a short attention span at times or defy a request. As long as these feelings or behaviors don't last or interfere too much in their day to day activities, there's probably nothing to worry about. If your child seems to be experiencing severe or long-lasting distress, it's an indicator of a mental health problem. Here are some of the signs your child might be having troubles: Always Unhappy All children will be sad at times. They might not feel well, someone was mean to them, or the family pet might have died. For some, the sadness doesn't go away. You might want to get help if, for two weeks or more, your child: • Rarely laughs or smiles, • Lacks usual energy • Begins doing poorly at preschool • Is very irritable, moody, or grumpy • Becomes overactive, destructive, or overly sensitive, • Gets into fights constantly If your child says they want to die or resorts to self-harm, please seek immediate professional help. Extremely Anxious Healthy kids have periods of anxiety. They're afraid of things like loud noises or separation from their parents. They might develop patterns of doing things like washing their hands excessively or lining up their toys. It's time to consider help when your child: • Maintains patterns of repetitive activity for a long time • These begin to interfere with sleep, appetite, or normal activities • Complains of frequent headaches or stomach aches • Starts to worry all the time • Frequently worries about death Lacks Friends Kids need friends. Some children prefer a small group to a large group. It's time to get help if your child: • Has difficulty relating to other children his age • Has trouble making friends because of overly aggressive or frightening behavior • Has trouble making friends because habits or behavior seem strange to other kids • is constantly teased or socially isolated Short Attention Span At times, all children have a short attention span, but you might want to get help when a child stands out as inattentive. Signals of a problem include: • Can't focus on an activity as long as other kids of the same age • Frequently fails to listen to instructions • Is often overactive • Regularly acts without thinking first • Is easily distracted • Is constantly being scolded or corrected • Endangers self or others Defiant and Aggressive Every child has times when they don't behave. During the toddler years, defiance appeared to be a positive development. You might ask for help when your child: • Has frequent temper outbursts or more than other children • Has constantly battles for control with adults • Seems spiteful and openly defiant • Is disrespectful and tries to hurt adults or other children • Can't stay in child care or preschool because of defiant behavior Inappropriate Behaviors Mental health problems show up in other ways, too. You might consider talking with a professional when your child: • Displays behavior which should have been outgrown long ago, such as clingy behavior or toilet accidents • Displays sexual behavior that exceeds normal childhood curiosity • Repeatedly plays with fire or is cruel to animals • Hears voices or sees things that aren't there except when involved in imaginary play The signs of mental illness in children vary by age and type of condition. However, two warning signs tend to cross over into all categories and signal that you should consult with an emotional health professional experienced in kids' psychology. • Extreme or peculiar behavior for the age and gender of the child, such as being significantly more hyper, aggressive, or withdrawn • Sudden, hard-to-explain negative changes in behavior, such as a steep decline in school performance Finding Help Many parents choose to talk to their family doctor or pediatrician first about their concerns. If more help is needed, the doctor can suggest names of counselors, social workers, psychologists, and psychiatrists who specialize in treating children with mental health issues. Parents also reach out and touch base with other families in the community, family network organizations, crisis outreach teams, family resource centers and support groups. If your child's hurting, don't be ashamed to ask for assistance. Appropriate treatment can help your child learn to cope with trauma. Adults who understand a child's abilities can help the child develop necessary skills. Pregnancy.org https://gillsonlinegems.myshopify.com

The Secret Word to Easier Parenting by Abundant Mama

“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.” ― Benjamin Franklin You want your child to do what you ask. You want them to hear you the first time. You want them to do it right, too. But, they don’t listen. They squawk and argue. You’re feeling hopeless. You don’t want to fight about it. So, I give you the secret word to easier parenting that also happens to invite connection between you and your independent offspring. Are you ready? Here’s the secret word to easier parenting: Let’s (is that really two words?) Let’s clean your room. Let’s go outside and play. Let’s read. Let’s eat all of our veggies tonight. Let’s see how fast we can get the dishes done tonight. Let’s make dinner. Let’s __________. {Fill in the blank on what you’ll say today} Using let’s is a lot nicer than saying GO. It’s more welcoming. More loving. More playful. And, so, even if it doesn’t always work (because it will not always work), by using it you’ve begun transforming how you speak to each other at home. And that makes the world a happier place to live, doesn’t it? What do you think? Is this a word you use often or not? Please share any other words you use on a regular basis to create more peace in your home. If you like this idea of easier parenting, please sign up to get on the Abundant Mama waiting list for April 2015.http://www.abundantmama.com/the-secret-word-to-easier-parenting/

A Parent's Survival Guide to Shopping with young children by Sam Ikin

A parent's survival guide to Christmas shopping with young children By Sam Ikin Christmas shopping can be fun and exciting; a time filled with the joy of giving and finding a bargain - unless you have young kids. Then it can become a terrifying experience which strikes fear into the heart of even the most experienced parents. "A three year old and a one year old having a tantrum at the same time can be quite hectic," Nicole Storey said. "Just leaving all the shopping, putting it all back on the shelf and walking out." She was one of half a dozen mothers who had sought refuge in The Haven, a large parenting room run by the Hobart Mums' Network. Mother of three, Kirsty Shields, said she often had a similar experience. Christmas shopping with kids survival tips Plan your shopping trip Do not over commit: spread shopping over two days if you need to Start early and get a convenient park preferably not on the street Identify bathrooms, toilets and rest spots before you set out Take your pram instead of the sling/harness Tag-team shop: team up with another parent and take turns supervising the kids Make it fun: mix some activities in with the shopping "You just drop the basket and run. I don't even bother about putting it back where it goes," she said. "[I] call my husband and tell him to go and pick it up on his way home from work." Christine Jolly from the Child Health Association of Tasmania (CHAT), who is also a mother with young children, said all parents will be able to relate to stories like this. "We've all seen it happen either to ourselves or to the poor mum in the street and the little toddler has just cracked it," she said. Ms Jolly was the architect of the hugely popular Hobart Mums' Network (HMN) which boasts around 5,000 members. The group started out as a Facebook page which expanded and is now part of CHAT. HMN has become so popular it was able to open the parents' room known as The Haven, a facility many mothers rely upon to make their trip to Hobart's CBD bearable. While it is run by HMN it is also open to dads.

Parenting rooms can be a 'Godsend' Ms Jolly said there were a few things parents can do to get through Christmas shopping with children and keep their sanity intact. "It's great to have a space like this where you can break up that to do list," she said. "[For example you could say] 'we're going to go to three shops and after that we're going to grab a hot chocolate and then we're going to go to The Haven, then we're going to go to the library and then go to two more shops and then go home'. Mums take a time out from shopping at the Haven PHOTO: Mums enjoy some quality time with their kids at The Haven run by Hobart Mums' Network. (ABC News: Sam Ikin ) "It just makes the trip into the CBD that much more palatable." For Ms Jolly planning a day in the city with the kids is essential. "You have to have a plan otherwise it's just chaotic and you want to stay as far away from the CBD as possible," she said. "One of the things to do in the plan is find out 'where are the public toilets? Where are the parenting rooms?' and include that into your planning and know where they are at all times." A handy tool for parents to use is the Hobart City Council's mobile friendly website gottogo.com.au. It could come in handy for any parent in the case of the frequently occurring toilet 'emergency' or nappy blow out.

He who fails to plan Hobart City Council's gottogo.com.au page Mother-of-three Kirsty Bell said if she did not have a little help sometimes she would never get out of the house. "I don't have enough hands for breastfed twins that sometimes explode everywhere with poo," she said. "I need somewhere where there's another mum to hold ... I can't do it without somebody to help me." She is not alone. Ms Storey said she will often enlist the help of another mother to help tag-team shop. "It's good to meet a friend here with her children and one of us will duck out and do a little bit of shopping," she said. Ms Jolly also suggests parents take the pram instead of the baby harness or sling. "Make sure you have a good pram, a pram with lots of storage space where you can tuck those gifts underneath the pram or hang the bags on the handle," she said.

Shoppers urged to be considerate The one constant theme from parents battling the Christmas shopping crowds was the embarrassment caused by judging eyes when a child throws a loud and public tantrum. Ms Jolly said that it was easy for people who do not have young children to quickly rush to judgement. "I advise everybody in the community, if you see a mum with a little one who has just had a little bit too much try not to cast a judgemental eye because you were there - you were that toddler one day," she said. "Try to just give her a smile or that fist bump of solidarity." http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-12-04/surviving-christmas-shopping-with-children/5938524